**EDIT**
I just figured this out today, I think my english teacher was actually emphasizing quantity over quality. Wow. Way to go.
**END EDIT**

Seems like bad days are piling up as of late.
This week is a nightmare. Just plain flat out terrible. And on top of it all I can't remember anything!!
I've forgotten multiple things multiple times and on top of the terrible shit its just making it worse!
I don't know if I really really want to get into all the details...but here's the synopsis:
-forgot my math book in my locker, had to do my HW at school during a free period
-forgot I had to write something for english class for a presentation, effectively making it so that I did nothing on the project. I'm pissed at myself and my partners because its not all my fault.
-forgot to print out my journal for english, have it on my laptop so I show the teacher on my laptop. Of course she decides this is the perfect moment to ask me stuff.
-so she asks me what I did on our project. I say essentially nothing because I was supposed to write something and I didn't, but on the powerpoint and poster neither of my partners allowed me to assist. They simply weren't communicating with me. Last week they essentially told me: we're doing this. It's almost done. Write this. AND THAT'S ALL I HEARD ABOUT IT! Granted I did forget to write my thingy but C'MON!!! That is not communication!!!
-she also decides its the best time to ask me about my limited participation in discussion. I explain to her that my participation is normal for me. I don't usually talk that much and I personally don't think I ever will. But she's convinced I must talk more so that she has (And I quote) 'more to grade me on'. Fuck shit. Discussion isn't the only or major part of the grade. She's also convinced I have a 'unique perspective' for some godforsaken reason. I don't think my perspective is different from anyone else's. (to see why I don't force myself to participate refer to my previous journal which is filled with joy and happiness)
-So now I'm crying. I cry no matter what negative emotion I'm feeling. I could be pissed the hell off and crying. It's my gut reaction to negative emotions, go figure. I try my best to pull myself together. I cried the day before because of the presentation thingy and now I'm crying again. I hate crying with a burning passion when it happens at school.
-she proposes that I do the whole project over ON MY OWN and have it due a few weeks from now. I'm not totally pissed about this, but I'm not really that pleased. I'm glad she offered me essentially what would be a second chance, but part of me loathes that too. She also sets up something so that I talk on monday FOR SURE. *sigh* I don't know what to do with this....she's a new teacher so I'm trying to cut her slack but it ain't working out.
-My friend is nice to me and very helpful both times when I cry which is nice. Because I'm a complete mess over this whole thing.
-after lunch my friend saw my teacher talking with the student counselor person Dr. Grundt. I'm afraid she was talking about with him because I fucking cried. Seems like teachers treat crying as a red flag of crazy. I cry at everything...I get the least bit upset over something and I cry...no one seems to be able to comprehend this. So I'm hoping I don't have to see Dr. Grundt because my teacher is 'worried that I'm too stressed out' or something fucked like that. Not that I don't like Dr. Grundt, he's cool and everything. I'm just fucking sick of crying. And I know if I talk to him I'll cry some more. Fuck I'm crying right now.
-I'm just so fucked up in the head right now.

So you know an average week in the life of me XDDDD
I hope next week is better.
This week was just a fucking nightmare. I told my teacher that but she seemed unconvinced. Somehow she got the impression that I'm highly disorganized. Which I am not. I AM JUST HAVING A BAD WEEK!!!! fucking can't remember shit to save my life. But whatevs. I can fail english who gives a shit?
that's where I'm at with all of this.
I'm not going to talk just to get points.
I'm not that morally fucked.
I'll talk if I have something to say.
That's it.
That's all.
Live with it, I know I can.
~ZombieDrummer~